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Joke of the Day

"Why did the knife quit? It couldn't CUT IT! woohoo! I made this one up while sitting at a buffet table. Enjoy! ~Skip"

"People ask where I see myself in 5 years But I always tell them that I don't have 2020 vision"

"""Dad Is that a killer whale?"" ""No son thats an orca"" ""Oh. Well what's a killer whale?"" ""U see that whale that's covered n tats & smokin weed"

"What did the painting on the wall say to the cop? I've been framed!"

"Did Pinocchio catch fire when he masturbated?"

"How to get a cop's attention"

"I always carry a small bottle of Tabasco when I fly. You never know when you're going to crash in the Alps & have to live by eating people."

"What did the the dad say to the feminist? Hugh Mungus"

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Holy Roller"

"How is toilet paper and the Starship Enterprise alike? They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons."