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Joke of the Day

"Don't ever date an Aztec woman.. They will rip your god damn heart out."

"What do you call a poem about flour that does not rhyme? Gluten freeverse"

"What Do you Call a Bowler that drops his ball a lot? Gutterfingers!"

"*watches as both hands turn into devils* *looks over sink* HAND SATANIZER ""Oh, this is just great"""

"Why don't you say grace when eating Chinese food? Because they run you over with a tank if you do. Found this on Becker, didn't know if I should put this here or goingtohellforthis"

"When someone says ""but i thought..."" in defense Well, a guy thought that shit is a sugar so he shat into his cofee. How did that help him, hm? Props to my dad for this one."

"Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? Because he needed his space."

"You know what this new carpet needs? For me to open a tube of blue toothpaste, and jump up and down on it. - My 4yo. Apparently."

"When you talk about IP addresses of an iPad Do you call it iPaddress?"

"Snapple's made from ""The Best Stuff on Earth."" Really? Heroin-laced Nutella?"