101009

Joke of the Day

"There are many fish in the sea. So while waiting I'll just play with my rod."

"I really dislike my CW, so everyday I steal a Kleenex from her desk. In about 500 days, she's gonna be pissed."

"If a coworker has two apples in his right hand and two oranges in his left hand, what does he have? No chance of blocking an uppercut."

"""The search for the man who terrorises nudist camps with a bacon slicer goes on.... Inspector Lemuel Jones had a tip-off this morning, but hopes to be back on duty tomorrow."""

"My girlfriend text me ""lets watch Godzilla""........ I reply ""look at the mirror""!"

"My husband and I are thinking about leaving everything to our dog. What he will do with $20.00 I don't know. But I hope he enjoys it."

"What did the mailman ask his girlfriend? Will you envelope with me? (I know its Corny, but it makes me chuckle.)"

"Now I'm not saying I plan to be a school shooter... but if I was Dylan.."

"[a dolphin kisses me at sea world] ME: so like what are we"

"My friend just found out that he is both gay and dyslexic. He is still in Daniel."