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Joke of the Day
"Why don't you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it!"
Next Joke
"Why don't lawyers have sex with their clients? To prevent double billing."
"I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people living above me are furious."
"How many spoiled rich girls does it take... ...to change a light bulb? Just one, she yells, ""DAAAAADDY, I need a new house!"""
"Don't be offended if I speak to you condescendingly. Be happy that I care enough to be sure your simple mind understands what I'm saying."
"How can you tell if someone is a chemistry major? They have a mole on their body."
"I slept through my girlfriend's alarm this morning and hit the ground running after her husband threw me out the window."
"I just purchased Big Foot repellant. Er, sorry, a camera."
"I swear if I hear Uptown Funk one more time... I will smash my radio. Don't believe me? Just watch"
"Don't email me a link to a 6 minute youtube video. I wouldn't watch a video that long if in contained clues to solve my own murder."