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Joke of the Day

"1) Find and catch a rabbit 2) Go to restaurant 3) Complain about a hare in your meal 4) Enjoy free meal plus adorable household pet"

"That Chief Keef album hypnotized me earlier. I didn't even realize I was stealing from my mama purse until she paused my music."

"Im just an average guy with 2.4 kids."

"I keep getting the urge to purchase a big white bear from the artic... ...Doc says I might have ""Buy Polar"" disorder! EDIT: arctic*"

"Oh, I'm just in the bathroom stall, standing on the toilet. So yeah, it's 4/20 & I'm totally high on pot."

"Doctor: You are very sick! The patient to the doctor: Can I get a second opinion? The doctor again: Yes, you are very ugly too..."

"I saw Casper the ghost. I said, You look pale and drawn."

"Unfortunately a skeleton couldn't go the prom He had nobody to go with."

"I was in the attic the other day... ...and I found a Christmas present that I meant to give to my daughter a year ago. It's a shame I forgot about it, she always wanted a puppy."

"What is the most racist dinosaur??? The Tricericops"