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Joke of the Day

"Short simple fish joke A fish is swiming upstream in a river hits a concrete wall looks up and says ,dam!"

"What are the first 3 words in every authentic Mexican recipe? Steal a chicken"

"How long does it take for mods to remove a post? [removed]"

"How do you get a gay guy to have sex with a woman? Shit in her cunt"

"The World Cup has an official song. The official anthem is ""We Will Find a Way."" It narrowly beat out the other contender, ""I Feel Someone's Teeth in My Shoulder."""

"""You can't sleep either?"" Says a voice from under your bed."

"I hired an old German plumber when remodeling my apartment He was a great guy, very reliable and thorough. But it seems old habits die hard. He connected gas main to my shower."

"[friend being eaten by a bear] *screaming violently* Me: Stay calm! Don't move so much! I'm trying to take a picture for snapchat!"

"*Takes out phone & plays Cindi Lauper's True Colors as you reach for the last slice of pizza without asking*"

"What's a boxer's favorite part of a joke? The **punch**-line :)"