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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between and old computer and a woman? a computer accepts a 3.5 inch floppy"

"I have a Pakistani girl friend. Last night she said that she wanted to blow me. Now I wasn't sure if I should lower my pants or call the cops."

"Did you hear about the hearse that got into a head on collision? Luckily only one person was found dead at the scene"

"Sooo when my husband became a pool man I really thought the sex would get immediately better"

"2 hr flight, better buy 8 lbs of fruit and nut mix."

"Hell is filled with news anchors tapping stacks of papers on desks and engaging in lighthearted end-of-broadcast banter."

"Why did the crazed Packers fan throw out all of Aaron Rodgers's forks? They were too Cutler-y."

"To all those people who said I would be an unfit parent, have you seen the little guy lately? Cause that would be a big help, I seem to have misplaced him."

"I can actually decide what is inspirational on my own. But thanks for the warning"

"Who should we vote for the next president? Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3."