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Joke of the Day

"Who should we vote for the next president? Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3."

"Anytime you see a young man open a car door for his girlfriend either the car is new or the girlfriend is."

"- Are you even listening to me? - Of course I am - Ok, what did I just ask you? - If I'm listening to you"

"What are Muslim men's favorite mathematical equation? Inequalities"

"Here's to honor!... Get honor, stay honor. If you can't come in her. Come honor."

"Women treat me like God. They only talk to me when they need something."

"Got EM DEEZ NUTZ"

"Two Drums and a Cymbal fall off a ledge... ba-dum chsh!"

"What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef"

"I hate when someone asks me where I see myself 5 years from now when I don't even remember where the hell I was 2 days ago."