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Joke of the Day

"A sign in the window reads CURED MEATS. Inside, a salami takes his first steps since the accident. A prosciutto learns to forgive."

"I wondered why the Frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me."

"I saw a synopsis and some abstracts shot down in a hail of bullet points. I guess it was a summary execution."

"Hey man, why do you have all these self help books on your floor? I hate my shelf."

"Q: Why don't blonde's like audio-books? A: There aren't any pictures."

"What is McDonald's demolition service called? Quarter pounder."

"What is the most common disease for lettuce? Icebergers"

"The court has decided you guilty of clickbait and has sentenced you to death by the electric chair... ... What happens next will shock you"

"I hate when I buy new shoes, and I have to learn to drive all over again."

"What do you call 2 guys fighting over a slut? Tug-of-whore."