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Joke of the Day

"Careful, this is an alphabet bomb! If it goes off, it could spell disaster!"

"Why are so many Mathematicians vegetarians? Cos Lettuce"

"don't feel too bad for people with chronic amnesia. they can watch Breaking Bad for the first time over and over."

"My 4 year old thought it was pretty cool that Simba could do whatever he wanted after Mufasa died. This is concerning."

"If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?"

"Ever had sex while camping? It's fucking intents"

"I ran my car into a pole The poor bastard never saw me coming"

"I told my wife she would look sexier with her hair back... She was pissed! Apparently that's a insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient."

"[NSFW] A good crime sentence is... ...be made to fuck a ratchet"

"Seek respect, not attention. It lasts longer."