99501

Joke of the Day

"What's black and never works? Decaf coffee"

"Yo mama's so stupid that she burned down the house with a CD burner."

"My doctor told me if I was 5"" taller I'd be at the ideal weight, so I'm going to try and give that a shot."

"Interview tip: maintain eye contact. If they try to look at documents, put your head between them and the documents."

"Has anyone here ever smelled mothballs? I'm having trouble getting their tiny legs open."

"[Pulled over] Sir do you know how fast you were going? MY DOG IS IN LABOR! Oh! In that case *scribbles* Here is a ticket for littering."

"A funnier shorter vampire joke What did the vampire say to the woman teacher? Bla...bla..see you next period."

"You know someone is hard core When they have strong and well-defined abdominal muscles"

"If an Italian could time travel, where would he go? To the Pasta."

"Why don't catholics wear condoms? Because little boys can't get pregnant."