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Joke of the Day

"I don't take my wallet to work because I'm afraid someone will steal it while I'm sleeping."

"What do you get when a mountain climber crosses a mosquito? You can't cross a scalar and a vector."

"The most Canadian sentence ever. Sorry aboot spilling too much maple syrup into your Tim Hortons coffee, eh?"

"Why did the aliens choose to not invade and enslave the human race? Because they're not garbage collectors."

"I hate babies when they are crying. I hate people who love babies & think babies are cute. I hate grown up babies who make more babies."

"How do redneck Na'vi get their skin tone? Blue Genes... I'll be here all week"

"Roses are red, violets are blue Some poems rhyme this is not one of them"

"The washing machine broke so I had to wash my undies in the river. As a bonus, 3 catfish floated to the top afterwards, so dinner is served!"

"if God exists it's probably a woman no man holds a grudge for this long"

"Whale dad joke 'Dad, where did I come from?' 'From my penis' 'Oh...thanks.' 'You're whalecum.'"