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Joke of the Day
"""Oh, look at the moon!"" I've seen the moon. Thanks."
Next Joke
"Why does Marx support New Years Eve celebrations? Well, it's got everyone out and about, celebrating another revolution..... (I'll show myself out)"
"Everyone can find one person or three cats waiting for him."
"I like my cigarettes like my Instagram. \#nofilter Edit: learned formatting"
"Stop saying I'm my own worst enemy. My worst enemy is Johan, from the stables; I want him dismissed, but he's curried such favor with father"
"I'v been catfishing my best friend Dave for the last 3 weeks. He's gunna pay me that $50 he owes me or I'm showing these emails to his wife."
"*logs on Facebook IT'S YOUR OLD HIGH SCHOOL BULLY'S BIRTHDAY TODAY! *logs off WAIT COME BACK! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD ABOUT YOUR EX'S ENGAGEMENT!"
"Why does a chicken coupe only have two doors? If it had four it'd be a chicken sedan!"
"I tried to catch some fog yesterday Mist"
"Passengers clapping when my plane lands makes me almost wish we had crashed."