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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Irishman who tried to swim the English channel? Halfway across he decided he couldn't make it so he swam back."

"Some people are just better left alone. In a jacket, in a room with padded walls."

"How did the lawyer chip his tooth? The ambulance slammed on its brakes."

"What do you call a small dog? A subwoofer!"

"What mental illness does Hank Hill have? Propanic Depression"

"Anger; the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind."

"So a man walks into a bar... And hurts his head."

"I can bench 170 lbs. And by that I mean I can sit myself down on a bench in a pretty park."

"The word of the day is legs... Spread the word!"

"A friend of mine died from a sore throat... ... Th**e**y hung him!"