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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a golf ball and a G spot? A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball."

"Whenever I'm sad, my dad tells me ""cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"" I know he means well..."

"Nothing is worse than having a cranberries song stuck in your head, in your head, in your heeeeeeeeeeaaaad zombie zombie zombie eee eee"

"What do you call an alligator who's wearing a vest? An investigator."

"Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life...... unless it gets in his way."

"Juliet: yo I'm dead Romeo: same Juliet: OR AM I..."

"We should replace Punxsutawney Phil with Ben Bernanke... that motherfucker also never gets it right."

"Sorry I missed your funeral, but in my defense, you're not coming to mine."

"Five chickens leave Topeka traveling west at 25 mph. Please help me find them chickens. Those are my chickens."

"I like to stand in the corner at parties and blow on anyone who walks by. People hate it, but I'm a fan."