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Joke of the Day

"What is Hitler's least favorite letter? The gas bill."

"A small part of me almost died today.. Specifically mini-me"

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Without a penis."

"My friend told me he wanted to join the Spanish Inquisition the other day. I managed to Torquemada it."

"Where is Macau? In m'field"

"A Jewish man was talking to a Hindu man Jew: Yeah, so in my religion we only believe in one God. Hindu: No way! Jew: Yahweh"

"I'd have more respect for the weather man if he just got on camera & said ""I have no idea, your guess is as good as mine -go outside & look"""

"The guy in front of me is buying a pregnancy test....I bet this is the only time he would rather be buying tampons."

"""Ah, Mr Bond, I-"" *closes laptop lid and pulls up trousers* ""-wasn't expecting you."""

"What spends a good 3 hours a day in my hand? *hint* it starts with P and ends with S. Pens! :D ... wait what were YOU THINKING?!?!?!"