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Joke of the Day
"Why did the premature ejaculator cross the ro... never mind."
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"What does a vegan zombie eat? Graaaaaaaaaaains"
"Looking for someone willing to kill a man who has wronged me. Unfortunately I can't pay but would be good exposure for an emerging murderer"
"Why has ""America"" been abbreviated to USA Because it has to Capitalize everything"
"My plan is simple. Drink Vodka until I start speaking Russian."
"How do you turn soup into gold? You add 24 carats!"
"Hello. I am Public Restroom. Would you like some toilet paper that melts in the palm of your hand? Here, have some empty soap, my child."
"First rule of Botox club: Nobody look surprised when someone new joins."
"Why did the violinist go to jail? For fingering A Minor."
"My pregnant wife said her doctor told her no more sex until the baby is born I asked, ""What did your dentist say?"""