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Joke of the Day

"How did one tire get the attention of another tire? pssssssssssst"

"What do Bud Light and having sex in a canoe have in common? They're both fucking close to water."

"Why doesn't 'Murica have any knock-knock jokes? Because Freedom Rings!"

"What happened when the Eskimo teens went clubbing? They got new fur coats."

"Why did the cyclist stop riding? He was two tired"

"Did you hear about those 3 guys who stole a Calender? They each got 4 months."

"I'm human, but I never got to go to space. Dogs and monkeys *aren't human, but they did. That's the gist of my lawsuit against NASA."

"There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. The fraction guy reminded me of this."

"I thought I had an STD once... turned out it was just carpal tunnel."

"What do you call an extremely flamboyant loaf of bread? A faggette"