97768

Joke of the Day

"Smartphones don't prevent people from feeling alive and getting in touch with nature. I just walked into a tree."

"What do you call a Finn, who gets something done? -Finnished"

"Your cough sounds much better this morning? It should. I've been practicing all night!"

"What do you call a gangster who is really in touch with his emotions? An emo-g "

"Interviewer: ""So why should we hire you?"" Me: ""Cause I need a job very badly."" Interviewer: ""So?"" Me: ""And you have a vacancy. BINGO"""

"Tweets What's the difference between a tweet and a twat? One makes the other."

"I bet that at some point in history a baby ate a dingo."

"autism awareness day A day for people with autism to be aware they have autism"

"Watching an episode of Star Trek (original series) and my 8 year old says the uniforms remind her of The Wiggles. I can't unsee it now"

"How does a cow kiss? Smooooooch"