97329

Joke of the Day

"Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a note on my windscreen which said, 'Parking Fine.' That was nice..."

"I use my imagination to solve problems. And by imagination, I mean booze."

"Life and Coffee I like my life like I like my coffee, as dark as it can possibly get."

"When I got my first pube, I left it under my pillow and waited for the pube fairy. And he came. All over my pillow."

"Two blind man at a cinema: ""Can you see something ?"" ""No"". ""Then let's go in front !"""

"Why don't you see tampons with maxi pads? Because they're stuck up cunts."

"What's the best thing about Alzheimer's? You meet new people every day."

"Did you hear that computer scientists have designed and built the perfect tennis player? He's a big server."

"A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.''"

"What kind of dog is the quietest? A ""shhh""nauzer"