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Joke of the Day
"Quitting tobacco is not that hard I do it several times a year"
Next Joke
"Why is food better than men? Because you don't have to wait an hour for seconds."
"You know how I know it's lunch time? Reddit is slow as fuck"
"[day 1] hello, world [day 2] bit less wobbly today [day 7] making other deer friends. getting funny looks tho [day 26] turns out i'm a hippo"
"Hillary Clinton is gonna be our first f president Oops, someone deleted the emale"
"Animals in Australia There are 2 kinds of animals in Australia: * Those that want to eat you * Sheeps"
"A month before my grandfather died we decided to cover his back in lard. After that he went downhill very quickly."
"My wife said: ""Can my mother come down for the weekend?"" So I said: ""Why?"" And she said: ""Well, she's been up on the roof two weeks already."""
"""I really wish I could squeeze that piano over and over"" - guy who invented the accordion"
"Young Actor: Dad guess what? I've just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man who's been married for 30 years. Father: Well keep at it son. Maybe one day you'll get a speaking part."