96366

Joke of the Day

"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender says, ""Hey, that thing is cool - where did you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""Africa."""

"*Rubs lamp* *Nothing happens* Where's the genie? *Takes off lampshade* What's wrong with this thing?"

"Driving Have you ever been driving down the road and you flick a cig out of the window, then a few minutes later you smell something and turn around to see your nan fingering herself in the back seat?"

"I used to be into sadism, bestiality, and necrophilia... ... until I realized I was beating a dead horse."

"Did you know that Rosa Parks died because... She refused to get in the back of an ambulance"

"Why are gay people so fashionable? Because they spend so long in the closet."

"The Titanic was recently visited by a diving crew with a robot submarine. What they found out was completely amazing. Even after 100 years of being sunk, all the pools are still full."

"I met a Wheelchair user yesterday. He's a stand up guy."

"A man goes to the zoo and the only exhibit is a dog... It was a shitzu"

"Me: I ate all the chips. Wife: What!? For the boys' lunches!? Well, at least we still have cheeze its. Me: You're not going to believe this"