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Joke of the Day

"What kind of cancer does an amnesiac oncologist diagnose? Adenocarcinoma"

"What happens when clowns get divorced? They end up in a custardy battle."

"Why didn't ken and barbie ever have kids? Because ken always comes in a different box."

"How do you compliment a girl with a cold sore? You tell her that her smile is contagious."

"What is the most useful thing in the French Army? A rearview mirror, so that they can see the war!"

"What does an Asian person say when asked, ""does the carpet match the drapes?"" I don't have a carpet; I have an Oriental rug."

"Father Christmas: How do I stop a Christmas Gnome being airsick on the sledge? Gnome : Put a five pound note between his teeth and stick his head over the side of the sledge."

"What has 4 wheels and flies? A garbage truck."

"I tried playing hide-n-seek with my friends newborn and now I'm not allowed back inside that hospital :("

"My version of a haunted house is hitting yes when an ATM asks me if I'd like to see my balance."