96100
Joke of the Day
"I told my sister I'm into incest she took it really hard."
Next Joke
"Why wasn't the cat moving? It was on paws"
"I'd like to shake the hand of the guy who invented the snooze button... in like 9 minutes."
"My hand is stuck in a jar of salsa right now. I'm just gonna leave it in there. This is who I am now. I'm tired of fighting."
"I hate when I accidentally say ""I love you"" instead of ""I'm biologically driven to want to reproduce with you & I'm temporarily delusional"""
"[1st day as cop] captain: ""why did you call for back up"" me: ""there was a fly in my car"" swat team leader: ""what exactly do you think we do"""
"An infectious disease enters a bar... the bartender says,""we dont serve your kind here"". The disease replies, ""well you're not a very good host!"""
"Arrived home last night to find a man trying to steal my front gate. I didn't abuse him though, I thought he may take a fence."
"""I just can't control myself around you"" - Me talking to a homemade batch of cookies"
"It costs $6 to visit Karl Marx's grave. Google it."