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Joke of the Day

"My son- Can I have ice cream? Me- No, it's breakfast Him-The dog just pooped in the living room Me-Clean it up & you can have some ice cream"

"I've found out why gay people dress so well... It's because they spent so much time in the closet."

"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with Cheese"

"Young Billy stuck the knife into the outlet... He said it was a shocking surprise."

"What would you call a set of old school rapper emojis? Em-OGs"

"What's the difference between a stripper and a hooker? Usually about $40"

"Take it Like a Man ""Take it like a man"" is a phrase that means something completely different if one is hit in the crotch."

"Who lives in a hut with a couple pieces of trash and two grains of rice? An Ethiopian person who has been hoarding for several years now."

"What is Putin's favorite new ballot? Crimea River"

"Me: Shhh, your brother is still sleeping. 4yo: *runs upstairs CRASH JUMP ""Wake up!"" SLAM *runs back downstairs ""No, he's not."""