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Joke of the Day

"How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't worry about changing the lightbulb. I'll just sit here in the dark."

"""So your telling me that you'd be willing to lick your SO's butthole..."" ""But all be damned if you would share a toothbrush!"""

"What do you call a herd of masturbating cows? Beef stroganoff"

"I told my SO that now Movember is over they should shave their mustache. She didn't take it very well."

"A roast beef walks into a bar... Bartender says ""Hey! Get the hell out of here! We don't serve food here"""

"I've replaced my neighbors toothpaste with Napalm, and left him a free pack a cigarettes. Now we wait."

"Knock knock! Who's there? It's me."

"I told the insect I knew he used to be part of an elite military unit he was exuberant"

"[Michael Bay directing] ""WE NEED A HOTTER CHICK"" Teacher: This is your son's 3rd grade play ""Oh right. I forgot. WE NEED BIGGER EXPLOSIONS"""

"Teacher asks a student to count from 0 to 10 Student : 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 Teacher : Where is 5? Student : Yesterday I heard in the news that 5 died in a car accident. DIE"