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Joke of the Day

"My pick-up line used to be ""Hey babe, I'm a hotspot. Wanna log-on""? doesn't work anymore, now they just yell at me ""fuck off you homeless begger""."

"How long does it take for a Jew to get 100 meters far? It depends on the wind strength."

"You know what they said about the year old sheep that kept getting into trouble... ...he was a mutton for punishment."

"Whenever Adobe Flash tells me to update I download and install an even older version, that's MY revolution"

"What do you call a puppy with a camera? A furtographer"

"Why won't people know when you replace words with instruments? Idk, accordion to research I guess."

"How did the dog's owner know his pet was angry about having soap flakes for breakfast? He foamed at the mouth."

"Autocorrect, no matter how many times I tell you, I don't want anyone's duck in my can't."

"I'm suffering from a more rare kind of stomach ache. It's called Indiegestion, I doubt you've heard of it before."

"My brother ran into my room just now and said ""Someone dumped exactly seven used condoms on my bed!"" I said: ""Huh, that's odd."""