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Joke of the Day

"How did the dog's owner know his pet was angry about having soap flakes for breakfast? He foamed at the mouth."

"Why isn't NSA mass surveillance a hot topic in the US elections? Because it's the only part of the govt that listens to the American people."

"DATING TIP: Pick up the check. Pick up the table. Pick up the chairs and the waitress and the bartender. Everyone loves upper body strength."

"A report found 9 out of 10 bishops write with a fountain pen. Only God knows what the other one does with it."

"A vulture is boarding an airplane carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess says, ""I'm sorry sir, there is only one carrion allowed per passenger."""

"What's black and sits in the back of a cop car? The seat"

"Famous Last Words List your favorite ones. The one I liked the most when I was growing up: Tarzan: ""Who greased the vine?"""

"What do you call an old person trying to fit in with today's kids? A dislocated hipster."

"I still believe in love. But I also believe in sasquatch, nessy, and that I could win the lottery. So there's that...."

"What Did MLK Say When Asked If He Suffered From Jock Itch? I have a cream."