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Joke of the Day

"Why don't women run fast?? cause they hate getting fat!! edit: It's physics. The faster an object moves, the heavier it gets."

"Why has there never been an Asian president? Because they are taken to the hospital if the election lasts more than 4 hours"

"I have a friend who is in the Guinness Book of World Records for ""Most Concussions"" He lives about a stones throw away."

"How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? Don't worry... they'll tell you."

"What's the difference between eating pussy and smoking a cigarette? The taste changes the closer you get to the butt. *what do they have in common. soz about that"

"What airline allows you to pee in cruise? Wizz Air"

"I invented a new word! Plagiarism."

"People without profile photos, put your photo up 'cause there's no way you're as fat as we're all imagining."

"Happy that I paid $ for a gym membership to exercise the little neuron in my brain that argues whether I should go to the gym every day"

"There are three kinds of people in this world.... Ones that can count and ones that can't"