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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend finally watched Back To The Future. It's about time."

"What do you call a knight who cheats on tests? Glancelot"

"What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..? I herd."

"My daughter has recently become deathly afraid of our cat. So I'm going to have to get rid of her. At least I'll have my cat to comfort me."

"I don't think my Mom knows much about children. Why do you say that? Because she always puts me to bed when I'm wide awake and gets me up when I'm sleepy!"

"What's Scotland's BIGGEST cause of depression? Lonely ness."

"A customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes to the technician. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with Xeroxed copies of her diskettes."

"I went to a Pantheist forest yesterday. I tried to read the map, but all it said was, ""You are HERE"""

"I just want a time machine so I can show up at the Salem witch trials with an iPad."

"One day I mixed my girlfriend up with flour and butter then I stirred in some milk and sugar. She's scone now..."