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Joke of the Day

"[does his regular grocery shopping] Cashier: having a kid's birthday party? Me: ...................yes."

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"You shouldn't eat Xmas decorations You will get tinselitis"
"""Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway? What could go wrong?"" ~My son apparently"
"What city would you be in if you dropped your waffle on the beach? ....Sandy ego."
"A Spanish magician says he can make himself disappear on the count of 3 Uno, dos... Suddenly the magician disappears without a tres."
"Have you ever been so high you had to pull over and ask someone for directions, and when you do it's your fridge and you're not driving?"
"My Father was never proud of me One day he asked me, ""how old are you."" I said, ""I'm five"" he said,""when I was your age, I was six"""
"Australian politics"
"I hate lying people, they're always in my way to the ocean."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bethany ! Bethany who ? Bethany good movies recently !"
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