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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dog on the beach? Sandy Claws Merry Christmas"

"I used to have a 2 year old son, he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died... For inspiration"

"Not only did I find 5 grey hairs on the top of my head but they were also sticking straight up. So....I'm transforming into Albert Einstein."

"Why do Mexicans walk around school like they own the place? Their Father built the place and their Mother cleans it."

"My wife said that my 5 year old gets really hyper because of the sugar he has at breakfast so I think I'll stop putting it in his coffee."

"My crush said he made his phone keys sticky thinking of me so I dumped him. I'm disgusted. What kind of loser still has keys on his phone?"

"These Jehovah's Witnesses are getting creative. They are now knocking on my door dressed as cops saying they have a warrant."

"I have a hardcore yeast affection. I love breads and doughs."

"You know what they say, once you go black.... You're a single mom."

"What the person on the street corner approaching me w a pamphlet doesn't understand is I want the world to end"