93106

Joke of the Day

"At least once a day I say ""nice to meet you"" to someone I've already met which is a great feeling for all involved."

"Me: Hi. Can I help you? Him: I'm here about the wanted ad for the one night stand Me: Great. Where is it? Him: What? Me: The nightstand."

"How do you spell wrong? R?o?n?g. That's wrong. That's what you asked for isn't it?"

"The Orthodontist wants to pull my daughter's 2 loose baby teeth & charge me $250. I bought the biggest bag of caramels I could find for $5."

"Now I'm not saying pollution has hit dangerous levels in New Delhi, but all my friends there are celebrating Nausea November."

"Have Egyptians tried unplugging and plugging Egypt?"

"It's 2011, microwaves should have one button that says Cook Shit."

"Pull the pin out of a grenade... and you can keep it for the rest of your life."

"Knock Knock... Horizontally Knock Knock. Who's there? Horizontally Horizontally who? Quick, The *whore is onto me* hide me from my wife."

"I watched the footage of Saddam being executed, and it really made me think... Is there nothing on the internet that I won't masturbate to?"