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Joke of the Day

"The midget fortune teller who kills his customers is a? small medium at large."

"Never heard this joke before... neither will you"

"Just found this hillarious joke I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like his passengers."

"can you start monday at 8? ""yes, thank you for the opportunity"" [calls new boss at his home on sunday night] hello? ""am or pm?"""

"How to spot an Aussie 1. Shout 1 3 DOUBLE OH! 2 Wait till someone shouts ""6 TRIPLE 5 OOOHHHH 6"""

"Blockbuster Joke George Lucas, Peter Jackson and James Cameron walk into a bar. George Lucas orders a cosmo. Peter Jackson orders a fine Sauvignon Blanc. James Cameron orders them both to shut up."

"Why I dislike German sausages. They are the wurst."

"I was going on my first date and my mom gave me a whistle... I asked her what purpose does this serve to which she replied, ""to remind you not to blow it."""

"What does Yao Ming stand for? When he sits down it takes too long to get back up."

"I got a discount circumcision from a friend. He did a terrible job, but it was really a fantastic discount. Now I'm not sure if I should complain or not. I'm really torn."