91970

Joke of the Day

"Why don't the dutch have a space program? Their spaceships Netherland."

"When I was 5, my Uncle Bob asked me to sit on his lap. It was quite touching, really."

"How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You kill her family."

"I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer... I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."

"""You do realize it's a crime to lie in court, right?"" *I think for a moment and then move my hands closer together*"

"I know it's just bad luck that what I post never reaches the front page. After all, I've definitely seen it there before."

"Don't just be one of those people who stares at their phone or computer twelve hours a day. It's important to also watch some TV."

"If I was in charge of SWAT I'd change the name to the ""Special Weapons And Grenades"" team just so police would have to radio in for SWAG"

"I Like My Rum Like I Like My Woman... 12 Years Old And Mixed Up With Coke."

"I met Michael J Fox yesterday... I was going to shake his hand but remembered it does that on its own."