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Joke of the Day

"My friend loved to collect tractors but stopped after he had a bad accident in one. These days he helps the fire service by removing all the smoke from burning buildings... ...he is an ex-tractor fan."

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"I have recently learned that it is considered poor form to sit on Santa's lap and ask to be made a widow for Christmas... The more you know."
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"This joke is an oxymoron it's unfunny."
"How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish."
"I moved into an advent calendar today... Its very cold, all the windows are open."
"""Muhammad's So Fat.. -what? No, I said, ""Yo' Momma."" Damn, this is why no one hangs out with you any more."""
"Where do Star Wars rebel officers eat? The Admiral Snackbar."
"""A smile is like tight underwear...it makes your cheeks go up."
"Why stop with two L's Lloyd? why?"