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Joke of the Day

"Pigeons die after they have sex... Did you know pigeons die after they have sex? At least the one I fucked did."

"What do pizzas and blow jobs have in common... Even when there a bit shit, there still pretty fucking good."

"That toilet owes me five dollars I just gave it a foot long."

"GEORGE WASHINGTON: We should put ""We Trust In God"" on our money THOMAS JEFFERSON: Great idea. Did you get that? YODA (taking notes): Yep"

"Calling your girlfriend dumbledore cz she is the real head master"

"What does a snowman say to his son on his birthday?(dad joke) Happy Brr-day son!"

"How do you know a Brigham Young student's been mowing the lawn? The welcome mat is destroyed."

"""I'm a skeleton!"" *kisses and hugs you* Stop that! *kisses and hugs you again* What kind of skeleton are you?!? ""An XO skeleton"""

"""OUI!!"" -French Canadian on a water slide."

"my favorite pickup line... ""Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?"""