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Joke of the Day

"My friends keep telling me I'm too indecisive And I'm not sure how I feel about it."

"What will the first female Mexican head of state be called? The Precedent."

"I don't blame Cat Zingano. I'm sure most men don't last 12 seconds with Rhonda Rousey either."

"I'm not condescending! Try and count how many times I've been condescending! Exactly; you can't cause you're a dumbass."

"How does a Chinese family name their children? They throw 3-9 pots and pans down a flight of stairs."

"Why does the man with the foot fetish always lose? Because he's in defeat."

"What is a neckbeard's favorite type of wood? m'hogany"

"I'm surprised my son doesn't think his name is 'stopit'"

"I've always wanted to know how long ""forever"" was... and by looking at some peoples relationships its around 2 to 4 weeks."

"The Koreans were printing with movable type in 1403. I was in 1402 and the noise kept me awake all night. - from MASH"