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Joke of the Day

"On this Fourth of July, just remember... He who comes forth with a fifth on the Fourth, may not come forth on the Fifth."

"A pirate with two peg legs walks into a bar... The bartender looks up from his newspaper and says ""you're cut off."""

"Lesbians build huge mansion in atlanta... It was all tounge and groove, not a single stud in the house. (Construction workers joke, you might not get it)"

"Why do women forget if you call them beautiful 100 times but remember if you call them ugly once? Elephants have good memory"

"What is the difference between being hungry and horny? What she means by ""eating out."""

"How do you start a rave party in Africa without a soundsystem? Glue a sandwich on the ceiling."

"What do you find between Godzilla's toes? Slow runners."

"My nickname in the North Pole is 'comma' I had sex with Santa's wife and separated the clauses"

"If you get raped... Then at least you know there is someone in the world who wants you."

"Did you hear about the plane that crashed on the way to the ginger convention? Thankfully there were no souls on board."