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Joke of the Day

"said to my wife... I can make a car out of noodles. NO YOU CAN'T she said. ...should've seen her face when I drove pasta."

Next Joke
 
"What do gnomes fear most about Christmas? They're afraid Father Christmas will give them the sack!"
"if you have penciled-on eyebrows I can't hear a word you're saying because I'm staring at them"
"""My husband had a heart attack while having sex with me."" ""I'm so sorry, ma'am. At least he died doing what he loved."""
"Why don't midgets like barbecues? because the steaks are too high."
"So what do you say to an invisible man? Stand Clear."
"""Well boy,"" I yell to my dog, seated in the basket of my pushbike as we plummet to the rocks below, ""naming you E.T. clearly wasn't enough."""
"I found this joke on the news when I went to America... His name is Donald Trump."
"Shoepidity... wearing ridiculously uncomfortable shoes just because they look good."
"My superpower is finding the one bathroom stall with no toilet paper."