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Joke of the Day

"Speculation was rife as to why Vladimir Putin has been missing for the last 10 days. Turns out he had the flu. That's what happens when you fight cold wars."

"If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Yes. Chuck Norris hears it. Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris can hear the shrieking terror in your soul."

"They Call this a condition... LOL Binge Eating Disorder. http://www.bingeeatingdisorder.com/"

"Earth is huge. There must be like 9 or 10 different countries on this thing."

"What do you call an internet cafe in Russia? A cyberian cafe."

"I just saw a guy running a race and masturbating at the same time. I wonder what place he'll come in."

"What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool ? She had mittens !"

"How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? A Brazilian!"

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? It is really easy to roast beef."

"What does a self-conscious vampire say? ""I'm going to suck.."""