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Joke of the Day

"Then there were 3 sets of footprints & God said ""This is Deb. She answered my Craigslist ad & U r the one who said we should try new things"""

"Have you heard about the corduroy pillow? It's making Head-Lines!"

"Im just an average guy with 2.4 kids."

"What's a pilots favourite artist? David Boeing."

"Unless you've been in Target with more than 1 child, you have no idea what it's like to be a lion tamer."

"A cop pulls over Heisenburg, and says... Do you know you were going 100 miles per hour? Heisenburg then replied, exasperatedly, ""Dammit, now I'm lost!"""

"Why do flower beds have mulch? So you can't see their underplants."

"There's no easy way to steal a watermelon."

"Dear Algebra, please stop asking us to find your x. and dont ask y."

"St. Valentine's day Two blondes chat: ""What you gonna do on St. Valentine's day?"" ""What day is it?"" ""Friday."" ""Shepherd's Pie."""