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Joke of the Day

"Mitt Romney: ""I believe marriage should be between a man and a woman, and a woman, and a woman..."""

"I'm the guy at the gym laying face down on the treadmill telling everyone ""I'm ok, I'm ok"""

"Rihanna the masochist paparazzi: why did you stay with chris brown? rihanna: beats me"

"I don't eat some foods. -vagueans"

"What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can't Helium, Barium."

"Men shouldn't feel bad if they only last 7 minutes doing doggy style... I mean, that's almost an hour in dog time."

"Why did the squirrel swim on its back? so it wont get its nuts wet"

"What to you call a Russian flea ? A Moscow-ito !"

"Opinions are like orgasms... Mine is more important, and I don't really care if you have one."

"4-year-old: What's ""saying grace?"" Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave?"