88474

Joke of the Day

"If an airplane from West Africa was flying during the Northern Lights, and there was a sick passenger onboard... ...would it be Aurora Ebola-alis?"

"Someone complimented me on my driving today They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."

"*Air horn sound* *Second airhorn sound* Me: ""Well this clearly isn't deodorant."""

"Ey gurl, is your name Andromeda? Because you got a heavenly body! It's 5:50AM and I still can't sleep."

"Did you hear the one about the man with a big procrastination problem? Eh, I'll tell you later."

"Dude yelled ""Fight me like a man"" at me, so I held him down and marginalized him for a thousand years."

"[New take on old classic] A priest, a lawyer, a saxophonist, a doctor, a telemarketer and a rabbi walk into a bar. ""Ouch!"""

"Adolf Hitler wasn't so bad... I mean he did kill Hitler."

"The sequel to Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory is just a series of horrified people finding parts of missing kids in their chocolate bars"

"What part of a football pitch smells nicest ? The scenter spot !"