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Joke of the Day

"So I got myself a Cuban girlfriend... She is my Guantanamo bae."

"An assault rifle that only shoots blanks should be called a JK-47! I am fun at parties please invite me to them."

"My bowel is upset. Must be full of shit."

"""How did the Russians help Donald Trump win the election?"" They made the Democrats deliver on their promises of transparency."

"LOL there's like 20 guys w/ ""Female Body Inspector"" windbreakers that's hilarious they're seizing my hard drive & business records LMAO"

"ME: You bring that cash you owe me? ELEPHANT: Oh, sorry man, I forgot. ME: No you didn't."

"What animal is prone to both manic and depressive episodes? A bipolar bear."

"Statistically 9 out 11 Americans won't get this I have nothing to put here..."

"Why can't a feminist shoot a gun? They can't handle the triggers."

"Someone told me I was obsessed with the song ""Wonderwall"". I said ""Maybe""."