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Joke of the Day

"Why was the chemist not able to get very far in his study of acids? He was only willing to consider the most basic of solutions."

"Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election? He TANKED his campaign!"

"OP's sex life."

"Me: This ""Fear the Walking Dead"" show is really creepy. Wife: This is the Video Music Awards."

"What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer."

"What will i do when i die? Idk!"

"Bread is not emotionally mature enough to have threesomes When you spread your nuts all over one slice, the other gets jelly."

"Q: What kinds of people don't get invited to blonde parties? A: Women!"

"This popped into my head in class the other day... Why do professors like stats and physics students? Because they'll work for p naughts."

"Two flies are sitting on a steaming pile of horse manure. One of the flies grunts and breaks wind. The other fly says, ""Geez! Do you mind? I""m trying to eat over here!"""