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Joke of the Day

"I just typed ""relationship"" and it came up ""delusional"" on my phone. First time I realized my phone really is smart."

Next Joke
 
"How do you get ""Dick"" from Richard? You ask him politely."
"Don't try to understand women. Women understand women, and they hate each-other."
"What is the difference between a diameter and a radius? A radius"
"Good yawning everyone"
"Always use a fish knife when eating fish, a tomato knife when eating tomato, and a Swiss Army knife when eating a member of the Swiss army."
"Everyone is normal until you find their Twitter."
"Where does monty python buy his water? From the knights Da-sa(y)-NI! This joke is best delivered verbally."
"Pokemon GO servers are like my life right now. Up and down and disappointing anyone who knows what it is."
"I saw an ad on craigslist for a mama sheep, a ram, and a cat fetus all for sale for only five dollars. I said to myself, ""Ewe goat to-be kitten!"""
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