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Joke of the Day

"I recently learned my friend likes to be dominated by his girlfriend in bed. I wouldn't have pegged him for that."

"all pants are breakaway pants if you're angry enough"

"What does the sterile man say when asked if he's gonna get neutered? Vas the deferens?"

"[OC] Did you hear the political interview in regards to homosexuality? It was hard to get a straight answer."

"If you are a driver who swerves right before turning left, take a long hard look in the mirror, and then punch yourself in the face."

"If a guy sleeps with a bunch of girls, they call him a stallion. If a stallion sleeps with a bunch of girls, they shut that riding school down."

"What is E.T. short for? So he can fit on a spaceship."

"Ran into the guy who broke my heart. Totally worth the damage to my car."

"The decision to not set back my clocks last fall is looking pretty good right now."

"A vampire stopped coming to my nightly poker games. All I said was that he made too many mistakes..."