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Joke of the Day
"Nice told me a joke How many bakers does it take to run a bakery? Bun Edit: Title should say Niece"
Next Joke
"What do you call someone who is always disagreeing with their calculator? A chronic math debater"
"When Hugh Hefner dies I don't think people will say he's in a better place."
"Did you know, the cave where Jesus was resurrected... contained a large quantity of hydrating body lotion? He was moist-jew-rising."
"Yeah, sex is awesome. But have you ever put clothes on straight out of the dryer?"
"Getting Old- It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker."
"If I had a time machine I'd alter the Big Bang Theory pilot episode so all the characters exploded in the very first scene"
"Waiter: And what would the lady like? Me: Waiter: Me: Waiter: Me: Date: Gigi, he means you. Me: *blushing* Oh, wow. He called me a lady."
"What does 90 year old pussy taste like? .....Depends."
"start out every morning with positive thoughts then put them in a pile and light them on fire to speed shit up"