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Joke of the Day

"Better be named after what? If you had to choose, would you prefer having a disease named after you, or be named after your mother in law?"

Next Joke
 
"What's the worst part about giving your dad a blowjob? His dick tastes like your brothers asshole! (ba dum tiss)"
"Ugh don't you hate it when you accidentally leave the volume up on your phone & the next stall hears the *click* when you snapchat your turd"
"How do Reavers clean their spears? They run them through the Wash. (In honor of the late Shepard Book. RIP)"
"What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller."
"Why is Rene Descartes considered a thinker? Because he is."
"""Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital..."" ""Peter, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."""
"Terrible I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, look what's telling me that."
"The phrase ""you two deserve each other"" sounds like a compliment, but never is."
"You've reached voicemail of [Jim], leave a message. ""Hi it's the library. The book 'How to Steal Library Books' is now 1 week over...UH OH"""